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De-stressing after contentious divorce negotiations: 4 tips

There is not much that stresses people out more than having to negotiate on the things they want to retain in their lives. For divorcees, sitting across from someone with whom they're losing a relationship and having a civil conversation about splitting assets or dividing child custody responsibilities can be a difficult battle.

If you've been through negotiations or are dealing with them now, the stress is a lot to bear. Fortunately, there are a few things you can do to reduce stress and resolve this situation quickly.

1. Take some time for yourself

If you can't come to terms with the arrangements your ex wants to make, it may be time to step back and take some time away. Sometimes, giving yourself space to think over what you really need or want can help you better understand where another person is coming from. Additionally, taking time away takes the aggression, panic and frustration out of a situation, so you can think about what's been offered or suggested with a clear mind.

2. Consider heading to mediation or arbitration

For feuds that you can't seem to get through, having a third party there to listen helps. Mediation is a method where another person listens to both sides and guides you to a resolution. Arbitration is similar, but a judge or arbitrator makes a binding decision for you after hearing the arguments you and your spouse have. Both have the potential to resolve difficult situations without heading to trial.

3. Reassess what's important

If you're stressing yourself out over minor things, you may need to reassess your situation and really focus on what's most important to you. Dragging out a divorce because of each minor dispute is not helpful to anyone involved. Of course, you should fight for major concerns, but when it comes to simple things, like who is getting a sofa or other minor asset, it's probably best to pick your battles.

4. Surround yourself with love and support

Finally, remember that you're not going through this alone. You have the love and support of family members and have every right to live a stress-free, comfortable life. Taking time to enjoy events and activities with family and friends could reduce the stress of your divorce and help you focus on the bigger picture.

With time and focus, you can get through any divorce, no matter how contentious. A good attitude and coping skills make a huge difference.

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