Lutins & Pilgreen, PC
Roanoke Family Law And Criminal Defense
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Custody Do’s And Don’ts

Child custody determinations are rarely easy, but at Lutins & Pilgreen, PC, we have seen parents get through them by observing some basic guidelines.


Do be willing to collaborate with your former partner. Even if you would rather never see him or her again, it is important that you work together to provide the best environment for your child.

Do follow any orders or instructions from the court. If the judge recommends that you take parenting classes or take other steps, complete them promptly. This shows that you are a committed parent likely to comply with any future court orders.

Do provide consistency for your child. He or she is going through an extremely difficult time, and maintaining a routine will help him or her feel safe and loved.

Learn more about protecting your child during difficult family law disputes.


Don’t withhold child support or alimony as leverage in custody disputes. Not only could it harm your child, but it is illegal in Virginia and may harm your case. If your former partner is denying you parenting time or otherwise violating custody arrangements, there are other ways to seek enforcement.

Don’t be late for visits, pickups or other scheduled time with your child. Only reschedule when it is absolutely necessary. Your child needs to know that you value your time together.

Don’t forget that appearances are important. The court doesn’t know about your wonderful relationship with your child. Judges only know what is presented in court. Avoid doing anything that could be used against you if documented — such as using illegal substances, missing visitation appointments or doing anything that could be perceived as harmful to your child’s best interests.

Do Work With An Attorney You Trust

Don’t Try To Resolve Complex Custody Matters Alone

Nothing is more important than preserving your relationship with your child, and your child custody lawyer should take that bond as seriously as you do. At Lutins & Pilgreen, PC, we are committed to helping parents succeed in child custody determinations, whether it involves negotiating a plan with your former spouse or fighting on your behalf in court.

To learn more about how we can help you and your children, please contact us online. You may also contact our office near downtown Roanoke at 540-627-5150.